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The Things I Never Thought I'd Say or Do...

After we became parents a few years ago, my husband and I started noticing was the number of weird sentences we never thought we'd say. As my daughter has grown, so has our list of awkward phrases:

"We don't eat applesauce with hands."

"Please don't put the doggie's tail in your mouth!"

"The refrigerator magnets won't work on the wall, kiddo..."

The more I started noting these sentences, the more I realized "never thought I'd say" teacher list is actually longer (and equally awkward)...

"Put your pants on!"- said to MB kids running around in shorts before changing into uniforms

"Please don't use the chair carts as go-karts."

"Why do you have a rotten pumpkin in your locker?" - painted pumpkin gone missing in Oct, found in June

The more we live with our kids (and students), the more likely it is we are going to say things we never thought we'd have to say and do things we'd never thought we'd do. But all too often, it is precisely those quirky things that further entwine our lives and builds healthy relationships. Teaching, coaching, and leading, much like parenting, is all about connection. The more we live together, the more opportunity we have enrich those connections. Nurture and care for one another. Grow.





It's no wonder that when one of those connections you've taken the time to nurture becomes broken, it can really, REALLY hurt. The more tightly we are intertwined, the harder it is for us to bear when the connection is severed. The things you never thought you'd do or say take on a whole new meaning.



I never thought I would receive that phone call. I never thought I would attend a former student's funeral.  I never thought I would have to share my condolences with their family. But I did. And it shook me to my core.

There is so little that can be done in the wake of a tragic loss. But in my efforts to find something to do, I have found some comfort and strength through fostering the connections that are still in my life: I've been hugging my kiddo and husband a little longer and tighter. I've been making a point of sharing with my students the value of both their work and their existence, not assuming that they already know. I've been redoubling my efforts for students to know the band room is a safe place. And I've been working to reach out to other teachers effected by the loss in the same way our school community has reached out to me.

Of all the things I never thought I would say or do, I never want connecting with kids to be on that list- no matter how difficult it may be when those connections are lost.


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